Monday, December 11, 2006

He Went to Jared? The Guy in the Subway Commercials? (part deux)

No Steelers game on Sunday, so let’s see … let’s take a look at other forms of entertainment like, say, cinema and television commercials.

The new film Blood Diamond, starring Leonardo DiCaprio and the estimable Jennifer Connelly, is out and was reviewed in the local paper over the weekend.

A blood diamond is a diamond mined in a war zone and sold to finance war efforts, frequently those of warlord factions in places like Sierra Leone, Angola, Liberia and the Democratic Republic of Congo (DRC). Kanye West has weighed in on this issue in his song, “Diamonds from Sierra Leone.”

Apparently, DeBeers Group, which controls the majority of the diamond trade, has expressed its unhappiness with Blood Diamond and Warner Bros.

Joey Porter’s Pit Bulls have yet to see Blood Diamond, but if you are one of the two or three people who have visited this site, you know one of our pet peeves is the incessant inundation of holiday-season jewelry store commercials.

The Christmas Ape from Kissing Suzy Kolber opined eloquently on this topic a few weeks ago, and we have ranted, as well. The timing of the release of Blood Diamond is in stark juxtaposition to the pre-Christmas airing of all the inane commercials from places like Zale’s, Kay Jewelers and Jared.

Jared? No, not the guy from the Subway commercials, but I always think of Subway when I see the commercials for Jared, the jewelers, which are probably the most annoying of any poisoning the airwaves.

They meretriciously pander to the basest level of audience idiocy; not to mention, the quality of diamonds you’ll be getting from these types of mass chain store, mall-based stores is subpar, as noted by The Christmas Ape.

So, diamonds are a girl’s best friends? Sure.

A long time ago in a land far, far away, Joey Porter’s Pit Bulls decided it was time.

We didn’t even own a car at the time, but off we went to Bailey Banks & Biddle to dutifully buy the engagement rock that cost about as much as a good used car. A really good used car.

Afterwards, on a work-related photo shoot, we mentioned the purchase to Harry the photographer and goofily said, “What have I got to lose?”

Harry got real quiet and pensive, and he paused before saying ominously, “Everything.”

We looked at each other, and he said earnestly, “Having been there, I can tell you this is not a step to be taken lightly. You can lose everything. Money, sure, but that’s the least of it. Peace of mind.

"And, the worst thing, time. If it doesn’t work out, you’ll never get back the time you put into it.”

You know what? He was right.

And if she hasn’t done so already, Joey Porter’s Pit Bulls hope she sells that damn diamond and buys herself a good used car.

Oh, and by the way: A recently published book, “Blood from Stones,” links al-Qaeda to diamonds. According to the book, al-Qaeda is likely using the hard-to-trace diamonds in place of cash, in various transactions to fund its activities around the world and to counter legislation on seizing terrorist-associated bank accounts.

Just something to think about, Jared.

NO, not the guy in the Subway commercials.